Lamplight vs. Spotlight - Can Introverts survive in this business enviornment?

 Coming from an Indian culture, my natural Introvert instincts have been further hardened by the culture which expects kids to be seen and not heard. Growing up, the hierarchy of business food chain was reinforced - summarized as Your Superior is always right ! For the last 15 or so years in the US I have been struggling with the society's deference to the Extroverts - Leadership was decided based on the person's "Charisma" and who cares if the content of what he says sucks as long as he is able to say it in style and sound intelligent. I used to spend sleepless nights blaming everybody for the lack of recognition of the value I deliver. To this day I struggle with this facet of life, even though I sort of accepted this fact of life and moved on. So this book Quiet - The power of Introverts in a world that can's stop talking" by Susan Cain  caught my I eye and I had to read it ! 

Difference between Lifting and Holding

The man sits on a tall chair. A pure white cat on his lap. His jeweled fingers gently strokes the cat and he says " I love you man"... The crowd roars its approval. Once again, Ceelo Green has the "The Voice" audience eating out of his hands. Almost a caricature of himself, the "Lady Killer" hides the "Singer-writer-producers-entertainment personality -actor- entrepreneur- mentor" that he really is. I was absolutely fascinated by his persona and the way he chose the right words to create the right impact in all situations.

Over the weekend, I was catching up with my reading and was struck by one of the quotes associated to him "There is a difference between lifting something up and holding something up. There is two different degrees of strength" (Article in Fast Company).

That was profound and something which I experienced very early in my professional life. It was my first start up  - A young "hip" company in Bangalore creating a stir among the young employees by introducing free beer during TGIF (Thank god it is Friday). I was the fifth person to join the company (After a very interesting interview process) and when I left it 12 months later there were 162 of us and the company was doing great. As I was leaving my mentor and the CEO of the company told me that there were some people who are good at starting things and some good at maintaining things. He said I belonged to the former group and wished me the very best. (He was and is one of the best mentors I ever had. Absolutely brilliant !)

Year went by and I slowly realized that he was right. I have this passion to build stuff, solve new problems, do things which people think are "undoable". But as soon as the heavy lifting was over, I started getting restless and wanted a change of pace. So when I was reading Ceelo Green words, I was reminded again of that day. Even though it was hard to take it (Being told that you were not good at something), I now realize he was actually pointing to my strength ! Two more start ups later, his words resonate...

What kind of person are you? The builder or the sustainer? Let me know...

Raghavan (Raj) Rajendran

The Curse of Knowledge

Have you been presenting to folks and getting not so good reviews? Do the stories you tell your friends some time falls flat ? Read on to find out the cure for that malady...

 

Here is the secret of how I overcame the same problem. "Made to Stick" by Chip & Dan Heath is an excellent book on how to make ideas stick in peoples mind. One of the aspects they talk about is the Curse of Knowledge where a "Tapper" has to tap out the rhythm of very popular songs on a table so as to get a "Listener" to identify it. The crux of the matter is that the tapper playing the song in his mind, tapped the table with the full confidence that the listener would understand it and identify the song. Meanwhile the listener without that knowledge has no clue what the song is and is unable to identify them !!

That story stuck to me ! Let me explain why and how it helped me with my issues ...

One of the problems I face when I make presentation to teams, is that sometimes I get the "glazed eye" look- Sheer boredom or folks fervently praying that I would not ask them questions and embarrass them in front of their peers.  Very frustrating right? Here I am putting my heart and soul into the presentation and I get this? In my mind I was explaining some basic concepts which everybody should get. Finally one of my mentors pulled me aside and had "The talk". He asked me pause and understand the audience - Take time to look at my presentation from the audience's level of knowledge. Some of the folks were business users and did not understand the techno speak. Or other did not understand that particular techno speak! So they did not have the context and they did not have the foundation to build on. Not their fault and here I was making a leap of faith that they are at a certain level of knowledge. The song was playing clearly in my mind. But the tapping did not make any sense to the audience ! 

Being me, It of course took multiple attempts to overcome my ego and make me get it. But when I did get it, I found that I was being understood better and was able to get a better agreement from the audience. Suddenly I was in demand as a presenter as well as a facilitator !

Makes sense does it not? So stop playing to the music in the mind. 

Try it out and let me know if you experience the same empowerment as I did 

Raghavan (Raj) Rajendran

Elephant thinking–Unlock your potential

If you have read my book, “Why Do Elephant's Have Big Ears”, you would know that I use two elephant stories to help you understand how we limit ourselves and fail to realize our full potential.

Over the weekend, I had been to the library (In spite of the fact that I had TWO kindles !! sometimes going to the library and reading a non digital book has its own charm!)and picked up a few books to read. I was very surprised to read a similar story in the book “Self Leadership and the One Minute Manager.


Here is the extract –“When they begin to train an elephant for the circus, they chain the baby elephants‘s leg to a pole in the ground. The baby elephants wants to get away. He pulls and tugs. but he can’t escape – the chain is too big and the pole too deep in the ground. So he stops trying. As he grows up, he just assumes he can’t get away. Today he’s a six ton elephant.he could sneeze and pull that chain – but he doesn't even try. Circus trainers say that they can put a piece of sting around the six – ton elephants' leg and he won’t break away”


Coming from a traditional Indian background, the Indian society is more interested in telling you what you CANNOT do rather than inspire you to try  out new things. I call it the the “society's train track”. They create one for you, lay it and expect you to follow it !


Coming to the USA has been an eye opener. No constraints and the fact that you could work hard in whatever you want to do and make money/be happy or just live. It is very liberating ! 
So friend, whether you have Elephant thinking or Large Elephant ears, it is time you unlock your potential !

Raghavan (Raj) Rajendran